NeTTys SeCreT DiarY

after 5 years of hardwork..headache..heartbreak…im finally back home..been totally beezeee for the past few month..finishing my thesis..managing ractar…handling different people with all sorts of attitude..meeting new people..ermm prospects maybe..ngeh..bz with sife projects…that i dont really have time for myself…nvm..now im back home..i just wanna cook..cook..cook..watch tv..have lotsa sleep..n do gardening…hanging around with my parents made me realise that i love them even more..everynite..b4 i go to bed..i would sneak into their room n kiss them ontheir cheeks..best…

to be continued

ok..wondering y i asyik ol pepagi jer ni…i pon bosan gak..ni la akibatnye bile dumb dumb plumbers gi pecahkan lantai my toilet n menyebabkan habuk everywhere..why cant they accept the fact that the pipes are leaking and the pipes..only the pipes that need to be changed?bengong la..dah la since friday i tak dapat tido kat my cozy bedroom..due to dust n my toilet seat yg derang dismantle tempoh hari..sigh..ni yg nak balik kl..disebabkan itu juga i jadi demam…sebab i kene tgk what they r doing…ye la..dah la i sorang2 kat umah..then derang masuk kuar my house..membawa bersama debu..dah la bukan nak kemas kan semula sampah derang..i gak yang kene sapu..ni dah hari ke 4, n im getting bored of not sleeping in my room..just change the pipes..is that so hard?really hate these malay contractors..tak systematik..plus agak lembap..ni dah mcm marah2.agaklahh..when sumone thrashes ur room,dismantle ur toilet,cud u even stand?

this 1 whole week has been the most tiring week ever.dah la ade some changes made to the module.. tak cukup team mates.. poket kering ni coz kene dahulukan duit seniri…last minute preparation..demam n stuff…bak kata pepatah..tido tak lena , mkn tak kenyang mandi pakai sabun..hahah…but ALHAMDULILLAH everything went well acording to planned..thanx to my frens who have been my back bone throughout this program plus the team from muadzam..hope they had an enjoyable experience with us and the ractarians..dah la they came mase sabtu pg dlm kul 2..n sori sgt2 coz i tak perasan u guys punye fon call coz i tido mati sebab makan ubat..huhu..nasib baik el ketuk pintu..ade door to door wake up call..huhu….tapi mmg la tido tak lena..mana tak mlm2 tido kul 1 pg..kul 3 bgn wat keje..6 tido bali,8 pg bangun balik settlekan unfinished business..i dunno la mcm mana i managed lebih2 lg tetibe demam..n suara mnenjadi seksi..hahahha…mungkin betul la kot kata wife en. dzul, kalau kita wat bende baik Tuhan balas ngan baik…tapi kite tak nampak..ps->demam tu mungkin ade hikmah supaya i menjadi tak mudah berputus asa,i dunno la cmne i bley gagahkan diri wat keje ni….i pon mungkin tak jadi kuat cmni tanpa bantuan Yang kat Atas,friends..din ,el,aishah(cik bidan terjun),farah,sha,kimi,shah,raden,syahril,suresh(thanx a lot),syaf(jurukamera kita)ruby, abg fairuz(ehem2->yg sepatutnya menjadi driver f1),yusof (abg cop),dila, fizah,syikin..muahx2..thanx a lot..sayang korang sumer..muahx byk2

im trying to do sumting good here tapi byk sangat suara2 yang tak menggalakkan plus x ramai yg bagi commitment..im kinda tired running here and there..my money wasted ..my energy…im trying to make things work here..please support n mind ur own business..sumtimes u really need to be cruel to be kind~

of all the incident that happened today..it made me feel a bit confused n sad..but some how i got a call from my abg at 2.12 am saying dat kak mai dah beranak..therefore theres a new baby girl in the family..im so happy

how do u choose the right path that was actually meant for u..u dont,right?what if u already know the outcome but u pretend that u dont know?and what if u know that the things that u did was totally wrong but you keep on repeating the same mistake again?what if u already know that the person is not meant for you, but you keep on hoping that he will eventually will be.why do u?whats holding you back?why does these feeling and questions keep on bugging me?it hurts to know and admit to the truth, but why do i deny.i should face it..but im too scared..im scared of rejection..im scared at almost everything that happens around me.why do i feel so insecure?..is that what life is all about?

to deny things that happens around me..is not an option..im just trying to protect myself..against whatever that makes me feel sad and insecure..how can i live without that someone but at the same time i cant live with him?its weird right..its kinda lame..but this is the truth about what im feeling right now..screw me..being there at that moment brings out the old sad memories which i should have thrown it away ages ago..i just cant help it.. it keeps coming back…it makes me feel sad just being there..cluless and not knowing what to do..and that is soo not me, lately…unclear about the whole situation..im caught up it this mess..i really have to get things straighten up..i need to break free..

actually come to think of it..how could i lost something that i never had..dowh!!

to the left
to the left

you can pack all your things- we’re finished
cause you made your bed now lay in it
I could have another you by tomorrow
don’t you ever for a second get to thinkin’
you’re irreplaceable

N: dead sexy-really?

O: Best in bed-hmm…

O: Best in bed-are u sure?

R: F*ckin crazy -sumtimes…

M: Makes dating fun-so true

A: likes to drink -i like to eat..silap nih

S: Easy to fall in love with -flirt je

L: Loved by everyone -im so adorable!!

I: Loyal to those you love-truly, madly,deeply

N: dead sexy-its confirm then that im not cute!!

D: Has one of the best personalities ever-caring, loving…

A: likes to drink -ok la..milo ais satu

@

N: dead sexy -see proven already!!

E: A GOOD KISSER -hmm…

T: Loyal to those you love-seriously

T: Loyal to those you love-till death do us part

Y: One of the best damn bf/gf anyone could ask for-not sure,any comments(from my x’s?)

A: likes to drink B: Likes people C: is wild and crazy D: Has one of the best personalities ever. E: A GOOD KISSER F: People adore you. G: never let people tell you what to do H: Have a very good personality and looks. I: Loyal to those you love. J: Lives life for fun. K: Really silly. L: Loved by everyone M: Makes dating fun N: dead sexy O: Best in bed. P: Popular with all types of people. Q: A hypocrite. R: F*ckin crazy S: Easy to fall in love with T: Loyal to those you love. U: Really like to chill. V: Not judgemental. W: Very broad minded. X: Never let people tell you what to do. Y: One of the best damn bf/gf anyone could ask for. Z: Always ready.

sengal2 satu badan..dah rub some yoko2 every area yg sengal…gatai sangat….tu laa….keje x nak buat..asyik main je..apalaa budak ni…dah final sem la..wake up!!!dah la kereta kat workshop..nasib baik diri sendiri tak jadi apa2…merayap je kerja..huhu…merayap kat area umah seniri je…dah nak jadi…jadi gak…sambung nntilaaa

u know what happens when u get mad?ur tone suddenly gets higher…ur head gets a bit cranky… a bit stressed up..n then u just wanna shout at others..especially ur loved ones..they would always be ur anger victim..to those that ive probably hurt in any way(their feelings, that is)..im so sorry…i really didnt mean to shout at you….or hurt u…it just came out..all of a sudden..im just stressed up with what happened recently….u didnt do anything wrong ok..but if u did however have done something wrong to me,i would not apologize as it should be u who should apologize to me…but since im oh so nice,i would forget but never forgive..hope ud understand…teringat lagu buat aku tersenyum by sheila on 7(but normally when im having problems or mad, they would leave me hanging)people wouldnt understand..cant u just be patient with me?